For those of us who’ve never experienced it, labor is one of life’s great mysteries. On one hand, there are tales of the magic and even orgasmic joy women experience giving birth. On the other hand are the horror stories of the moments when it’s exhausting, excruciating, and outright disgusting. Everyone who hasn’t been through labor wants to know what it’s like, but most people are too polite to ask the moms who have gone through it. Except me. I asked. And I got the lowdown on the good, the bad, and the poop (yes, there’s poop). You’re welcome.